The Art and Beauty of Making Love

     Well it is that time of the year, yet again.  Although loving and cherishing your partner should be a part of your every day life throughout the year this month is the month of love!  Cupid, Aphrodite, Chocolate, Bears (I added that in selfishly I still want a giant, soft, fluffy, pretty one--what can I say I love teddy Bears), Puppies (again, selfish addition because I desperately want a French Bulldog), Bouquets, and Fancy Dinners aside I'm pretty positive we all know that the weekend (not just the day) is almost a guaranteed "I'm going to get lucky" weekend.  All the impending giddiness aside I would like to get serious about just how lucky you really are.
       Our bodies are beautiful--man or woman, chubby, slim, curvy, svelte, tall, short, it doesn't matter.  OUR BODIES ARE BEAUTIFUL.  And when you are in a relationship where someone has chosen to share this beautiful gift with you--you should cherish it.  Hopefully you already do this, but if you haven't for whatever reason I encourage you to heed this advice and live it from this day on.  Honestly, I don't understand anyone not having the desire to know everything about their partner's body.  Do you not want to explore that wonderland?  How can you not want to know what makes your partner weak in their knees?  Is it not worth taking the time to bring them to a level of ecstasy that they may have never reached before--would you not take pride in that?  How can you not feel blessed and powerful knowing the pleasure and joy you can bring to them by knowing their body?
     First, though, I implore you to please set the mood.  Even if you take time to learn and explore them, but you make your partner feel unattractive or unwanted before or after then it will seem insincere and nothing more than a waste.  Be FULLY IN THE MOMENT.  Start the seduction with a gentle touch, or suggestive whisper, maybe even in just how you look at them (like you want to devour them or like there is no one in the world but them).  Everyone is different.  Hopefully you know your partner's seduction style.  Personally I am the kind of woman who loves to be seduced mentally--first.  I want you to catch my eye and speak with me with your look--reinforce it with your words--then solidify it all with your actions.  But, like I said everyone is different.  Some people are more physical and prefer someone whose touch is their undoing--others are seduced by words--it should be considered a privilege to know your partner in such ways as this.

     Once the mood is set then you can move on to the equally enjoyable and wonderful step of getting to know/explore them.  Speaking of, I really don't understand how, in the time you have spent together, you not know the smell of their skin and how it feels as it slides against yours; learned every inch of them--how it tastes--and where it is most sensitive.  How blind, selfish and callous can you be not to see how it changes color, arcs, curls, when you lick, nibble or bite it in one spot or another.  The touch of their hair in your hands or the feel of it as it slips through your fingers like delicate waves or soft bouncy clouds.  Allow your hands to memorize the shape and curve of every inch of it--then let your lips follow suit.  Watch how they breath, move, sigh, look them in their eyes and be aware--listen, taste, learn--partake in the bountiful pleasures this gift offers.  If you haven't before--get to know your partner's body from head to toe--this would be a perfect opportunity to do so (and make up for all the times you haven't, at least start to). 
     I guarantee you if you do, this will bring another level of intimacy, freedom and appreciation to your relationship.  And I am also sure this will embolden your S.O. to do the same with you.  Take time--MAKE TIME--I promise you, that you will never regret it.  Take time to cherish and honor the gift that your partner is sharing you--the most natural and precious gift--their body.  (*Please not the repetition of the word TAKE was intentional and not due to oversight.)  Well, I will try to post one more before the big V DAY, but if I am not able to, I wish you all Love and Happiness of the truest kind!

Always,
     Marissa

The Differences Between the Sexes

     Do you remember that book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus"?  I know I am dating myself a bit here, but do you remember just how big a deal it was when it first hit the shelves?  I do, I was a little young, although not that much, and I remember for the longest that was all most adults could talk about.  Honestly, I have never read it--nor am I inclined to, but the whole premise that men and women are from two vastly different planets is rather interesting.  It is also a touch sexist too considering that we created that classification box to decide that when certain sexes display certain emotions, thoughts and ideals that some are only acceptable for either a male or female to have.  But, I am being tangential in my thought process.  The point of my reminding you of that book is to emphasis how right it is--in a way at least--about the emotional differences between most men and women.
     I have had this conversation with my girlfriends multiple times.  Sometimes we wish we could just date each other.  Why? Not to fulfill a lesbian fantasy, sorry to burst your bubbles, but because we understand each other.  There is never a moment I have to worry about them not being loving, supportive and kind.  They are honest, dependable, accepting and fun to be with.  There is never a worry in my heart that I have to walk on thin ice or egg shells with them AND they appreciate all of my quirks and flaws.  They want to and do make time to spend with me.  They are emotionally available and open.  They understand their short comings and strive to better themselves.  They never lie to me or give me empty promises--as the list grows longer I am sure you can see why this is a conversation between us.  We get each other and understand what we need.  It would be as easy as breathing--it would WORK.
     Unfortunately, we don't have a real desire to date each other.  What's worse is there is such a pathetically dire shortage of men who know how to emotionally engage and connect with, that it seems damn near impossible to have a real relationship with them anymore.  Too many like to coast and have shallow relationships.  They don't want to or know how to expel the energy necessary to build an emotional foundation with the person they claim to love/care about.  What they don't seem to understand to this day, no matter how many books are published, is that an emotional connection with their S.O. is the most important thing to maintain.  Because once a woman checks out emotionally because of neglect it just pushes her that much closer to walking out the door.  Like one of my dear besties said earlier this week, "Women put up with a lot of shit, but when they have finally had enough it is really over".  I couldn't have said it better myself.  Most women really do try and try and try and try and try and try and try and try and--well you get the point, but when the trying is done and they keep giving and fighting to no avail and they decide it is time to walk then there is no way to save or repair the damage that has been done.  And yet most guys still wonder what happened and where things went wrong.  Well sweet cheeks when you don't nourish and care for the emotional well being of your relationship--you open the door for someone else to step in who will--you open the door for your S.O. to walk out too.  And the only person to blame is YOU!
     In reality Love isn't enough--you can't hang or abuse your relationship on the fact that your S.O. loves you.  You must build trust; grow to understand your S.O.; and nurture your relationship.  If you don't do these things then nothing else matters because the relationship won't succeed.  Every woman has a breaking point.  And if you don't care enough to give her what she deserves and you break her--then she is within her right to leave.  If you don't have the maturity or drive to see that these things are necessary and worthwhile then maybe you should just be man enough to admit you can't handle a relationship and be by yourself.  It is a little tough--but tough love sometimes is very necessary.  Besides a little punch to the throat is good for some people!  Until another time I do wish you all Love and Happiness of the truest kind.
     Always,
         Marissa  

Inclinations of Real Love

     Love is a beautiful and empowering thing.  I will always stand by that belief--no--by that knowledge for I know that it is true.  When love is REAL it is a revelation and even at times an entity that encourages rebirth.  No matter what happens in my life or relationships, I have found that his is a constant truth.  It can change people; it should change people.  When you love someone (no matter what kind of love it is i.e. familial, friendly or romantic) it changes your world and even how you see and treat the person you love.  When you truly love someone, purely, and wholly their happiness comes before your own.  For when the person you love is happy, you're happy, the happiness that is given is then shared in an endless circle between the two in the relationship.  (The same goes for unhappiness and sorrow as well.)  In loving someone--the desire to cherish them is innate.  And being just another natural Inclination of real love--and in desiring to fulfill it--you respect and protect them from the world and at times even yourself.  So, where you might have been selfish before you become selfless--when you really love another; when you would only protect yourself you now protect another.  Love brings growth in many different facets.
    And then of course there is the desire to learn and bond that comes with REAL love and care.  The adventure and privilege of getting to know someone with a depth that few others do is both thrilling and a deep desire of those who Love.  I don't believe it is possible to love someone and NOT desire or even truly attempt to know them.  How can you love someone you don't want to or just don't know at all?  When you love someone, in the desire to protect and be a safe harbor for them, knowing the depth at which the person you love hopes, dreams and fears is of utmost importance to you.  In getting to know their depth their world opens up to you.  And that is where and when the bond begins.  Learning their faults and virtues; interests and pet peeves is just as important as learning the intimacy and beauty of their body.  You can not love without learning or bonding--and if you do, then that love is shallow and doomed to fail, if you will forgive my tactless honesty.  Personally there is no desire in my heart to be with anyone in any form who does not desire nor sees the importance in knowing me.
     As you learn and bond with the person you love, your world opens up as well.  If the person you love is very different from yourself you are presented with an opportunity to learn from them--even if it isn't an interest or view point you share or agree with it is a new perspective and opportunity to see and understand things in a way that you haven't necessarily known of before.  It is also an opportunity to make that person happy by sharing in something that they enjoy with them--it also shows them their importance to you as well even if it isn't your thing to do, but you still do so, happily to enjoy something both with and for them.  If the person you love is very similar  to you then you can expand on the common interests you have together and even learn new things together too.  Every moment with the person you love is an opportunity to learn, bond and grow TOGETHER.  These are the opportunities that literally make or break a relationship.  Whether it is learning what makes them laugh; how to comfort them in times of need or distress; or how to play together, these are those (sometimes) little moments that will always mean the most and hold the greatest importance in the success or failure of a relationship.
    Then of course there is the beauty, necessity and joy of intimacy both emotional and physical.  Being a respectful, understanding protector of the one you love you have given them the gift and ability to be open and vulnerable with you.  This is a privilege, honor and a joy that is shared by the two people who are in the relationship together.  To become a person that is loved and trusted so much that another person is happy and comfortable being open with their emotions is a beautiful thing and quite the achievement too.  It is definitely a step in the right direction.  When your love is true, there isn't a need for the person you love to walk on egg shells; they can be exactly who they are and know that they are loved and accepted for being their wonderful self.  No need for masks or to hide behind expectations they know that you love their flaws unconditionally as they are a part of who they are.
     When someone can be emotionally vulnerable and open with you; then they can also share their physical intimacy with you.  But even this is different, even this has a different level.  When their is real love, trust and protection--again--another world opens.  Then the one you love feels safe to express themselves intimately without the fear of being judged, rejected or misunderstood.  When you create that openness and safety, then it is possible to take your time to explore and learn their body, there is so much joy in knowing someone intimately who can express and explore without inhibitions to hinder them.  An inclination of Real Love is to know the one you love in totality and not squander those opportunities by rushing, but by cherishing them.  And not just because of my own natural temperament, but because I honestly know the often skirted and overlooked importance of emotional and physical intimacy in a relationship do I encourage you to learn the one you love in TOTALITY.  What kiss quickens the breathe; what touch encourages a sigh; what bite births a groan; what nibble makes them weak in their knees.  Learn the feel of their skin; the arch of their neck; the dip of their shoulder and curve of their hip.  Again when you love someone their satisfaction comes before your own (just like their happiness) and is shared back again with you.  As I said before when you Really Love, you change, your desires and priorities change and not because you are told or badgered into it, but because you have  a NATURAL INCLINATION to be the person the one you love deserves.
     The inclinations of Real Love are what relationships are made of; if they do not exist how can the relationship exist?  Of course not everyone is able to love, really, in totality.  Some people realize this and still quite selfishly engage in relationships before they are truly capable of being an equal lover and partner in the relationship.  Unfortunately some do not realize it, even though none of their relationships ever reach a respectable longevity or even success--they blame everyone and everything before looking inward.  But then self realization and growth is difficult for the majority of people in this world.  To those who are not yet on this level, if love is truly what you want--the deep, long lasting love--I encourage you to strive and struggle to grow in order to experience and give it.  For those of you who are there--find someone who can match what you offer.  Believe me, it is a living hell loving someone who isn't on that level with you.  To everyone, I do wish you all Love and Happiness of the Truest kind!

~Always
Marissa           
               

The Dangers of Neglect

     Neglect has many forms but each are equally as dangerous as the other.  No matter what kind Of  relationship (romantic, friendly or familial) it presents itself in, it is truly dangerous and detrimental.  Neglect is like a gateway or a door opener for relationships.  It is a major source of deterioration in the love and trust of a relationship. And it spreads like wildfire. 
     The most interesting thing about it is that many times the Neglector doesn't realize that they are being neglectful.  And quite honestly I believe the people who are oblivious to the neglect they inflict are the absolute worst.  But in this case I would like to remind you all that perception is reality.  You see the person who is neglecting the other many times may believe their actions are anything but neglectful when in reality they are.  But since they are not on the receiving end of their actions and inflictions they believe  themselves as being virtually blameless as to the negative affect they have on others.  Where as the person being neglected knows this not to be true because of the effect the other person's actions has on them.  I believe that the results of actions, words and thoughts are the true reality that exists.  I will simultaneously recommend you all to be aware individuals and not just self aware--no--be relationship aware.  Be aware of the people you are in relationships with and your effect on them.  Learn to be self less enough to learn about them; learn how to read them and realize your effect on them.  This should be done regardless if you truly love and care for someone.  
      You see Neglect as I said before opens the door for other things and some cases people to come into the relationship.  It also opens the door for people to leave.  We are, after all, only human.  There is only so much harmful, hurtful,  neglect someone can endure before they are driven out of a relationship either emotionally, physically or both.  And no one should be expected to endure such harmful atrocities  either.  Neglect, such a dangerous creature, whose harm is barely repairable if at all.  I marvel when someone swears they love another but their neglect is so blatant that it is palpable.  Like I said, it is dangerous, and knowing what it feels like and others who do and have endured it, I can see how people are tempted to stray, betray or disappear from the relationships they are in.  Neglect puts people in to such sad states that at the first genuine opportunity for happiness they become eager, hungry for it and so will do anything to achieve it after they have been treated so badly for so long. 
    So my plea to you all is to be relationship aware especially if you care and/ or love someone.   Don't just care and love them with empty words and promises that hold no meaning.  Strive to be emotionally responsible and aware of your affect on others.  Until another time, I wish you love and happiness of the truest kind.

Marissa 

The Great Imbalance

     Although Nessy and I have been rather "quiet" lately, it doesn't mean we have forgotten our blog or fans.  We have both had a lot going on in our lives.  And trust me this is a very good thing.  It means that we are learning, growing, experiencing and living life.  And even though our absence has been short and there were a lot of things that have happened; there is also one--(sadly) glaring fact that has become quite apparent to us both.  We live in a society that perpetuates a great imbalance between men and women.
     I am not being sexiest, bitter or angry when I say this.  It is, quite regrettably,  a cold hard fact.  At one point in time what was important to men was honor, honesty, dependability, intelligence, fidelity,  love, accountability, family and being a good provider, husband and father.  But this is no longer the case.  Now our society encourages individuality over family; irresponsibility over accountability and dependability; money over love; and success over honor and honesty.  We live in a social culture that has been infested with negative ideals that celebrate materialism, excess, degradation, ignorance, greed, dishonesty, and a myriad of  other distasteful and disgusting attributes; practically eliminating the once upstanding and steadfast traditions that were once common place.     
      The continuous breakdown has resulted in men who want to be taken care of; takers; game players; and stagnated individuals who would rather suppress or ignore their shortcomings and "baggage" instead of rallying their courage and putting in hard work to break through and grow past their issues to become better men.  Very few desire to be a true partner, provider, father, husband, friend or lover.  It is like men have become so accustomed to satisfying themselves and their petty and short lived desires that they no longer understand nor do they see the big picture.  They are actually OK with giving bits and pieces of themselves (if anything at all) instead of cultivating themselves (continuously) in order to be a whole person who can engage in stable, healthy relationships.  And on top of all of that most of them believe that women should be satisfied with what little they are willing to do (again, if anything at all)!
     And as a subsequent ripple effect this has pushed women to stand more solidly on their own; to (even when in relationships) rely upon, fight, support and encourage themselves.  They may have a "partner" who exists in their lives, but they still stand alone because their partner isn't supportive, helpful, giving, or protective.  I have heard many women say (of varying cultures and ages) that being married is like having another child to take care of(...)!  Seriously men, do you feel fulfilled being a shell of your former selves?  Is it OK to be considered unreliable, immature and more a hindrance than a help?  Curiously enough I have also heard men of varying ages and cultures complain about not being wanted and women being TOO independent--(again,) SERIOUSLY!!!! You can not have it both ways.  Albeit a relationship isn't always going to be 50/50, sometimes it will be 60/40 or 70/30 and during those times you are supposed to give your partner extra support, love and understanding, but when a relationship is 90/10 or 95/5 then it isn't a healthy relationship--it is a parasitic relationship!
     In every relationship in life, no matter what kind it is, you get what you give!  You set the tone!  If you aren't reliable we won't rely on you; if you lie and/or cheat on us--we will not trust you; essentially if you do not give in return what we give to you freely; if you can not get on the same page with us--we can't (and won't) have a real relationship with you.  (No matter how much we love you--we have to protect ourselves and will not sacrifice our well being to have you in our lives when you take more (or twice as much) as you give!).  Man was not meant to walk alone if he were God would not have made a companion for Adam.  I will also admit that not all men are meant to marry (or women for that matter).
     Relationships aren't all meant to end in marriage with a white picket fence and two point five kids.  But, if you desire to be in a relationship (or eventually to be married and have a family) then men make sure you are ready--that you are on the same page as your partner--and you are in a place to be able to be in a relationship.  I hope men will start taking time to step back and start seeing the big picture again--to become the men they were; leave behind selfishness, lying and irresponsibility and embrace being men of honor, accountability and consideration.  I encourage men to live up to their potential, to correct this great imbalance and bring the world to rights.  I encourage them to achieve their greatness and with the same breath I encourage women to not settle for less than they deserve.  Do not allow someone to only give you bits and pieces when you happily give all of yourself.  Don't settle for an unhealthy relationship (no matter how much you love them) that will end in heartache when you deserve a healthy relationship and a happy ending.  Because the reality of it is--a relationship isn't only about how you feel and treat someone it is more about how someone feel and treats you! 
     Well Lovelies, just some food for thought.  Until another time I wish you Love and Happiness of the truest kind!
          ~Marissa

Let's Talk About Sex!

     If you think this post is about all my "dirty" little bedroom secrets, well slow your roll because it is NOT!  What this post is about is quite simply--communication!  We have blogged about communication in regards to many different facets in a relationship, but this is our first about communicating in regards to sex.  There can be no trust or intimacy (either physical or emotional) in a relationship--in any facet--if there isn't communication.  Well, how often do you remember to communicate with your partner in the bedroom?
    The only way to enhance intimacy between you and your partner is to show that you are open, receptive and trustworthy.  Nine times out of ten you probably get caught up in the emotions and the actions and before you know it--every thing is basically said and done.  Well whether before, after (or depending on how things are, during) you should take time to communicate with your partner.  If there is something that you really enjoy or really dislike, don't hesitate to let your partner know!  Compliment and verbally appreciate the wonderful things they can do and that you do together, too.  If you are feeling adventurous or curious about something talk with them about it--much more than likely your partner will be supportive and open and you two can venture into new territory together.
     Remember intimacy is important on all levels and this little bit of advice may just lead you to a lot of fun!  It may not be easy, if you aren't used to speaking to your partner about your physical intimacy, but we all must start somewhere.  And I am sure the benefits will be worth the initial hesitancy (or embarrassment) that you may initially experience.
     Remember communication is key to build a healthy and happy relationship--even when it comes to physical intimacy.  What can it truly hurt to try?  Until another time I wish you all Love and Happiness of the truest kind.
          ~Marissa  

Art of Seduction Part 4/ Undress Me

PREVIOUSLY WRITTEN:

     I believe the title is self explanatory so let's jump right in!  Don't underestimate the art of undressing your lover (but, I think paramour sounds more romantic, don't you).  Now as you guys know I am an advocate for clothes flying; hands in hair; teeth on skin; hot and heavy passion, but one should never underestimate the power of taking time to slowly disrobe the object of your passion!  AND as a special treat I am going to take time to "illustrate" why this is true (DISCLAIMER:  Suggestive Material Below):

     "...He closes the door and turns to look at you.  Your lips are still swollen from the deep probing kisses that he placed upon your mouth, intoxicating you to the point of enticing dizziness!  A knowing smile spreads across his lips as he comes closer, quietly and slowly eliminating the distance between your bodies.  A finger tip traces up your arm and slowly encircles the straps of your dress, a gentle tug sends the thin bits of satin sliding down to the bend of your elbow.  Hot lips kiss across your shoulder to your collar bone--A slight nip upon your neck almost feather light, sends shivers down your spine.  You watch frozen in physical rapture, as his other hand repeats the journey of the first, his mouth blazing a hot path to the other side repeating the same slow and decadent torture as before.

     You quiver, your hands finding the buttons of his shirt, separating them from the holes, creating an opening where your seeking fingers skim over the firm smoothness of his skin--setting him aflame, urging him to undress more of your flesh.  A sigh escapes your lips as your dress hits the floor and he whispers, "You are beautiful--perfection."

     You tug his shirt from his shoulders and he takes your mouth again in a searing kiss.  Pulling you close, your flesh against his, unhindered--there is a moment where your breath catches in your chest and as your eyes meet--his hands seductively dances up and down your spine..." (<-----Original Excerpt(now what was your argument for rushing?))

     The restraint in and of itself adds fuel to the fire and that flame will blaze even brighter as you take time to touch, kiss and caress with every piece of clothing that you slowly peel away revealing more glorious and decadent flesh to taste and explore.  Undressing is a beautiful way to entice and tempt one another and I encourage everyone to take time to do it.  Trust me it will be worth your time.  (Or was the excerpt you just read not enticement enough?)

     If you still think there is no reason to take your time, then maybe you should just try it!  Until another time I wish you all Love and Happiness of the Truest kind!

         ~Marissa

Frogs Aren't Princes

     PREVIOUSLY WRITTEN:

     The hardest lesson a woman will ever learn is how to walk away from a "frog" she loves.  Now don't judge me too harshly for calling (some) men frogs, but for me (again OUR blog, MY post) that  is exactly what wrong guys are, "frogs".  As women of the modern world we all expect to kiss some frogs, but fall in love with them, that's another story!  (Again, we can't control who we love!)  Falling in love with a frog is a dangerous thing because no matter how many times you "kiss" them (AKA:  wait, excuse; cry over; apologize for, etc) they will never (EVER) be princes because they don't have the ability to be.  No matter how much you love, sacrifice, support or help them (sadly) it doesn't matter--they are what they are.
    Now don't mistake "enchanted" (AKA:  "broken") princes for frogs.  THEY ARE NOT THE SAME THING!!  An enchanted prince has gone through many trials and unfortunately a wicked witch or two (although ultimately defeated) have left their curses upon them.  It takes a strong prince and a brave princess ("I am a princess--all girls are!"(ten bucks if you can name what movie that quote came from)) to break the "spell", but that in and of itself is very difficult (a true quest(especially when it has more to do with the prince than the princess)), but not impossible.  Sometimes good magic happens.  remember ladies a prince is a prince (broken or not) you just have to learn the difference between a prince and a frog.
     We can't date on potential alone--we can't keep frogs when we deserve princess!  Sometimes we just have to come to terms with the fact that we care/love/in love with someone who either isn't ready; isn't worthy or both.  There comes a time in these situations, where you have to accept and acknowledge how you feel while you separate yourself so you can walk away from an unhealthy relationship/situation.  Just because you walk away doesn't mean that you are trying to (or will) stop loving your frog it only means that you love yourself enough to protect your heart and happiness.  It is never easy walking away and resigning yourself to live with love your heart holds for your frog, but in the long run it is less damage to heal from.
     Even though I used "silly" analogies this subject is still quite serious and real--just something for y'all to think over!  Well until another time I wish you love and happiness of the truest kind.
          ~Marissa

The Art of Seduction Part 1/ Talk to Me

     Okay guys ( you really should start paying for this awesome advice) you know how you say that women are soooo talkative?  Well that is because we are communicative creatures.  USE THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE!  You see, we don't just like to talk, we also like to listen and we love imagining even more (there is a reason why (statistically) women read their erotica more so than watch it).  C'mon guys!  Revive your silver tongues and imaginations and start whispering sweet somethings (yes somethings, not nothings; don't waste your time whispering about things you will never do) to your girl!
     This is kind of obvious if you think about it.  Use your words to set the mood by being sweet, sexy or even very, very naughty.  You can start early in the day with sweet sugary phrases that let her know you  are missing her.  Progress into the afternoon by letting her know you want her and by dinner you can tell her exactly what you want to do to her and how (don't spare the details).  By the time you sit down to the table she will want to skip dinner and go straight to dessert--you!  You see (for most women) while you are verbally setting the mood with messages, emails or phone calls she isn't just hearing you, she is imagining every thing you are saying.  She is seeing it play out in her mind and remembering previous moments which heightens her growing fantasy from the seed you planted.  The more details, the more her imagination is sparked (along with her interest and desire)!
     Learn to communicate with your girl in a variety of ways.  Don't just communicate about the serious stuff.  Use communication to seduce her panties off.  Use it to add a little spice to entice, enthrall and build anticipation.  (Again I say) USE IT TO YOUR ADVANTAGE!  So guys, you are welcome and girls--you are welcome too ;) !  Until another time, lovelies, I wish you all love and happiness of the truest kind.
     ~Marissa

How Does a Man Show His Love?

     So one of my lovely friends asked this question this evening during a long and rather in depth conversation.  My answer was I don't know, not truly (does any woman, for that matter).  I don't know in specifics, I can only speak from my experience and I sure as heck can't speak for the sex.  But the question did spark something in me and as promised, this post is most definitely for her (not only, just especially)!
    * As I stated before, I can only speak from my experiences (I will do my best with this post, promise).*
     Every man loves and shows his love differently--this is true for everyone, whether man or woman, but since we are focusing on the opposite sex, let's stay on track.  A man's capacity to love depends on his definition of love; understanding of love; ability to receive and reciprocate love and his desire to love.  Considering the myriad of variations that I can't even begin to touch on (and do sufficient justice), I will touch on what little I do believe to know.
     Physical--Some men feel like they convey their love best with their bodies.  They relish touching and being touched.  They adore desiring and being desired and they show that when they give themselves and receive their women's bodies.  Whether it is PDA or sex (or both), some men show what they can not say with physical love and affection.
     Verbal--Some men are quite comfortable vowing the earth and moon and stars.  They will promise forever (whether they strive to or not, again, depends on the man) whether in verse, song or conversation. They are comfortable and gifted (with a damnable silver tongue) with being able to convey their love and devotion with their words.
     Providing--Some men show their love by providing for their women.  They work hard to give them the life they want and deserve.  They want to fulfill the role of provider and (financial) protector, so they work hard to build a life they can share and be proud of.
     Emotional--Some men show their love by being emotionally vested in their relationship.  They are supportive and understanding.  They aren't afraid to cry with or for you nor laugh with you either.  They show you not only what they feel, but that they understand (and can empathize) your feelings as well.  They are not afraid to show the world how you make them feel or how they feel about you.
     Thoughtful--Some men show their love by being thoughtful.  They are considerate and in considering their women, show them that they are important in their lives.  They do the sweet little nothings, remembering anniversaries and family members birthdays, etc.  They make sure that their women know that they are thinking of them and they remember the important things about them. 
     All In One--And then there are those who show their love across the board.  They show it physically, verbally, emotionally and with their actions and thoughts too (and with a whole lot more that I haven't even (nor would attempt to) touch on).  They are what I considered to be more well rounded (and rare) for they are in a place to love someone wholly and show it, not in bits and pieces, but in every way.  These are the men who are balanced and appreciate (as well as utilize) the many different ways of conveying their love.
     Even in stating this I will say that there are no limitations on any individual and the way they show their love (except those they put upon themselves).  Someone may start out preferring to show it one way, or another, or even a mixture of a few and (after hard work and genuine dedication) become an All In Oner.  Every ability (to love and show love) depends solely on the individual and this pale skeletal post can never deliver a truly just explanation in so short a space or time.  Yet, I still hope that it has helped even a little.
     Remember the only way to know how a (specific) man shows his love is by watching and listening.  And another note, don't try to change how a person shows their love.  True change can only come from a sincere desire (and choice) from the individual.  The fact that someone desires to show you their love for you is a truly precious and wonderful thing.  Enjoy and appreciate it to its fullest because love is a fragile and magnificent thing.
     Until another time, I wish you all love and happiness of the truest kind!
     ~Marissa