Love--It Varies

     After an interesting conversation with one of my girlfriends last night I was inspired to write this post.  Although she isn't the first person I have had this conversation with I would be lying if I didn't admit to my surprise at her surprise when I pointed out that love has many variations and differs from person to person; relationship to relationship.  C'mon y'all think about it!  Love has many variations because not only do our relationships differ, but the people we have relationships with differ as well.  The way you love your mother differs from the way you love your sister; which differs from the way you love your friends; which differs from the way you love your significant other.  Even if you wanted to compare the way you love within one group there are still variations.
     (Stay with me now) Example:  Everyone (and I do mean everyone (don't lie to yourself)) has a favorite parent, sibling, grandparent, aunt, cousin, etc. that they have bonded with (and love) more than other equivalent members of their family.  The love is different, the way you treat, see, communicate and think of them is (subsequently) different because of it!  You know it is true!  Even when it comes to romantic love (or probably more so) it is the same.  Each relationship is different.  Different connections, bonds, are made which form different levels of emotion, attraction, affection and love.  So you may love your 1st significant other with all of your heart, but you may discover later in life that you love your 4th more than your 1st because a deeper bond was made.  You didn't lie when you said that you loved your 1st with all of your heart, because you did.  You loved them with all the love that connection created within you for that person.  But the deeper bond with your 4th significant other encouraged a new range and depth of emotion and love that didn't exist in your relationship with your 1st significant other.  So you can say that you love your 4th with all of your heart and both statements are still very true.
     We can't compare how we love one person (no matter the relationship) to the way we love another because they are DIFFERENT.  Even if it is the same type of relationship it is still a different person!  Unless you repeat a relationship with the same person then there is no comparison to be made.  Just because the love you had for one person developed/presented itself one way doesn't mean that it will come about in the same order, fashion or circumstance with someone different.  (I told you there were a multitude of variations in love)  Don't expect every love you experience to be slow burning or white hot for that matter.  And count yourself lucky that it isn't.  If love were the same for everyone you loved or fell in love with what would you truly learn or experience for that matter.  How boring would that be?  Being able to experience fully the variations of love is a blessing.  I believe it teaches you a lot about yourself and the world.  What a wonderful surprise to experience the depths and magnitudes of love!
    (Just think about it for awhile) I hope you do realize that none of this is something you have control over (control is an illusion, after all) because you can not control something as powerful, as elemental and infinite (nor should you) as love!  The best thing you can do is learn to give and receive love; to appreciate and cherish it.  Don't try to shove it in a box or twist it into something that it isn't because then it becomes tainted and nothing good ever comes from tainted love.  Start bringing yourself up to the level where you can embrace love in its glorious purity, instead of dragging it down to you.  (Trust me the world becomes a different place when you do!)  Remember love is a gift from God ("...above these is love...").  Don't tarnish something so beautiful, seek to be worthy of it instead!
     Consider this a friendly observation/reminder.  Until another time I wish you all love and happiness of the truest kind!
     ~Marissa