A Good Man

     There was a time--an age--an era not so very long ago where the merit of a Good Man was considered as great as that of a Hero.  In many ways a Good Man was a Hero.  His integrity, kindness, selflessness, thoughtfulness, dependability was prized and rewarded.  Touted as a man who could be trusted without hesitation or doubt.  Someone you could and would go an extra mile for because he was not only worth it--but his very nature warranted it.
     These men were the cornerstones of good families, businesses--the very community and government.  When little boys were young they used to admire these men--they would dream of growing up to be good men.  Men who would be honest and reliable businessmen and responsible, positive citizens.  They desired a good education and career--they wanted to build families and be the kind of men that inspired others--inspired others to want to be both around and like them.  They were inspired and in turn were inspiring as well as men of contribution and good repute--they helped to build and maintain a good community.  For these kinds of men achieving the status of a "Good Man"  was a great one.  It brought pride to not only them, but to those who knew and loved them.
     Unfortunately this no longer seems to be the case.  Men who are good or even desire to achieve genuine goodness are now ridiculed and overlooked.  Being a good man is no longer an accomplishment that is sought after--it is seemingly considered not worthwhile.  The sad truth of it is guys are more concerned with what they have or can get or can get over on someone than in who they are or what they can contribute.  Infidelity, dishonesty, unreliability, irresponsibility, disrespect--these are attributes that are touted and perpetuated by society and even women.
     Ironically we complain about needing a change in our communities, local and national and yet we don't help good men succeed!  I know quite a few good men and sometimes what they are put through by external and even internal parties is appalling.  A good man, a good person, can not remain "good" if they are not supported or assisted or if they are constantly pulled down into the muck and mire.  We, as human beings, are fragile creatures.  We can survive and endure a lot, but when the limit is reached--then it is reached.  We can not expect great things from mediocre men and we can not expect good men to succeed when we do not support, protect and appreciate them either.
     Life is about balance and things are more or less out of whack, but we are the ones who disrupted that balance and so we are the only ones who can fix it.  For all of the good men out there, please don't lose yourself--stay strong--and surround yourself with genuine people who will help you become a better you and maintain your goodness.  Women--if you find a good man and you aren't ready for him OR he really isn't what you want then let him know *kindly* do not use him or break his heart.  And if you find a good man and you desire to retain what he offers then help protect and support his goodness.
     A good man is hard to find, but he doesn't have to be.  Just a little observation on my end.  I wish you all Love and Happiness of the truest kind!
          ~Marissa

Not All Heroes Wear Capes

PREVIOUSLY WRITTEN

   

      As most of you either know or gather by now, I work in a hospital--you may NOT know how many super heroes I work with on a daily basis.  (No, I am not talking about the M.D.'s, either.)  I am talking about the R.N.'s and PCT's!  They are the unsung heroes of the hospital.  These are the people on the front line dealing with explosive diarrhea and vomiting; placing Foleys and IVs; explaining/managing meds;  spending their lives making sure the patients are as clean and comfortable as possible.
     They have decided to dedicate their lives in service of others combative, confused, contagious or otherwise.  They keep up the spirits of their patients, families, fellow staff and even the M.D.'s.  They deal with medical, emotional and mental situations playing doctor, shrink and psychologist all at the same time--for multiple people 12 hours a day almost EVERY DAY.  They do what they do not for money, accolades, or awards, but because it is an innate desire they have to care for others (and you full well know what a rare attribute that is)!  They are happy healing and comforting the ailing, hurt and sick who walk through their doors.  It takes a special kind of person to be a nurse or pct.  A special kind of person to do what they do for a living!  Doctors are not the only healers so remember to go out and hug a nurse/pct today!
     Until another time, I wish you all love and happiness of the truest kind!
          ~Marissa

Thank You, Very Much

     Most of my life the majority of my friends have been--guys (don't most girls say this, though).  I mean I would have a few girlfriends here and there that I was very close to, but in college (in our varying "groups" of friends) there were usually 2 to 4 girls in a group of 7 to14 guys!  It just sort of happened that way although I have always felt that guys are just more fun because there is less hassle hanging out with them; far less hassle than hanging out with a lot of girls (outside of my girlfriends in the group, who are and will always be awesome).  I was truly committed to this belief for the longest time--until I started working at my new job (not really that new anymore, but still...).
     I have had the privilege to meet some of the most genuinely wonderful and sincere women ever in life, working at the hospital!  They are so fantastic it was rather hard for me to believe that so many of them could work at the same place (talk about mind being boggled).  And I have been luckier still to become close to quite a few of them, close enough to call them friends.  Although this blog isn't life changing or anything like that I did want to post a 'Thank You' to three of them in particular.
     The first is to my girl (my new bestie) Nessie.  She is so youthful and fun yet very straightforward and dependable.  It is a wonder to watch her growing more fully into her womanhood (she loves to remind me how old I am, lol) and see her developing into this fantastic, well rounded woman!  Nessie is a true and steadfast friend who I cherish dearly.  Even though she is still young there is one thing that stands out above all else with her--I have never met a woman who embodies (positive and healthy) self confidence and love as much as Nessie!  She is teaching me to see the beauty in myself again and to not only cherish it, but celebrate it.  This is a priceless lesson (or should that be, "refresher course") that she has given me and I can never fully pay her back for that.  I truly do love her like a sister and like a sister she encourages and supports me.  She has since the beginning of our friendship and I am sure she will continue to throughout the years.
     The next is to my fabulous Su-Su!  Su-Su is phenomenal!  She is encouraging, kind, funny, resilient, supportive and a good listener (to name a few things).  Also a divorcee she is a never failing source of advice and support for me.  Su-Su gives me hope!  She showed me that there can be life and happiness after divorce during a time where I thought and felt otherwise(one of the reasons why I always say that I want to be like her when I grow up, lol).  She is always thoughtful and understanding and took time to talk with me about what I was going through (she still does).  Su-Su helped me, to save myself, through a really difficult period in my life.  Again, saying 'Thank You' isn't enough and I wish I could repay her for being such a fabulous woman and wonderful friend!  Her never ending strength and gentle heart encouraged me (again, still does) when little else did or could.  She is a woman that I truly do admire and look up to.
     Last, but most certainly not least is Amel-lionaire (lol) or Mela!  Mela has a gentle, sincere, but joyous and playful spirit.  She taught me (again, another "refresher course") to enjoy myself and being a woman all over again!  She always encourages and inspires me (and many others, trust me) to make time to do the "girl-y" things and enjoy the h*ll out of life!  She can (and does) make any situation fun and ensures that amazing memories will be made (and captured).  She helps me to find the fun and joy in everyday life.  I swear I have never met anyone whose lightheartedness was contagious!  I aspire to retain that kind of spirit all of my life and this is all because of Mela!  She is truly a darling and most beloved friend.  I adore her and would happily bring out my gangsta side fa' ya'(lol)!  There are few others that I would happily get in trouble with, than Mela!
     These three lovely and phenomenal women were brought into my life during a very sad and dark time.  I truly was struggling--well I was struggling with so much when I met them.  They were (and still very much are) blessings in my life.  Without them I believe--no, I KNOW that I would not be where I am today; not without their constant encouragement, support and friendship.  Thank you, my lovelies, from the bottom of my heart for being so amazingly wonderful and good!  You encourage and inspire me still to this day and will continue to do so, I am sure, for a very long time to come.  You helped me to find the light in the darkness and find my path again, too.  As long as I breathe you will have my love, support and friendship.
     Thank You!
     Marissa